Over the past decade, the world of sports has gone completely corporate. The Broncos used to play in Mile High Stadium. Now they play in Invesco Field. Denver's other sports franchises play in the Pepsi Center and Coors Field. Across the U.S., there are stadiums named for orange juice, insurance companies, telecommunication companies and even a pet store chain.

So, why shouldn't a city sell its name to the highest bidder?

Last month, Clark, Texas, changed its name to Dish, Texas, after agreeing to a plan that will provide free satellite dish network to the town's 55 homes. In 2000, Halfway, Ore., changed its name to Half.com for a year, and was known as the world's first dot-com city.

And although we feel dirty even bringing this up, what about New Orleans?

Well, the federal government is pledging an additional $1.5 billion to rebuild the hurricane-ravaged city, bringing the total up to $3.1 billion in federal rebuilding money. With lawmakers saying it's not enough to ensure the city will be able to withstand a Category 5 Hurricane, and the cost of the Iraq War now at $250 billion, could we see New Orleans go corporate?

Someone get Bill Gates on the horn. Picture it now: Microsoft's New Orleans version 2.0. Imagine the possibilities of a city rebuilt and fully wired for the Internet.

Maybe The Donald would like to step up and rebuild New Orleans on next year's season of The Apprentice. Or maybe McDonald's could rebuild the city, call it New McOrleans and citizens could get a Big Mac on every block. Or how about getting Starbucks to chip in a few billion, put a coffee shop on every corner, and they could call it Tall, Double-Shot, No-Whip Orleans—the city would thrive with large quantities of caffeine greasing the wheels of the local economy.

Even Bourbon Street could get a little more specific and sell itself to the highest-bidding bourbon distiller. Maybe they could even get a corporate sponsor for Mardi Gras—hell, it worked for every major college football bowl game and every new stadium, didn't it?

Pass the soap. We feel dirty for even mentioning it.

All right, admit it. You chat on your phone while you drive. You prefer catching up with friends instead of using your turn signal. You schedule meetings or check up on your kids while sitting in gridlock. Some of you even pay bills on your morning commute.

Well, according to a recent study, 10 percent of Americans now drive and dial on a daily basis, up from 8 percent in 2004. Six percent of drivers hold the phone to their ear as they drive—thank God for automatic transmission, right?

And while the national numbers are probably a little lower than the regional average, we can't help but wonder when or if a law will be passed to outlaw cell phone usage on Colorado roadways. After all, you'd have to be either a dummy or a Sprint stockholder to think driving and dialing doesn't increase your risk of causing an accident. In fact, a recent study in the British Medical Journal found drivers who gab and drive are four times as likely to wreck.

Currently, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey and D.C. have banned hand-held cell phones while driving, and Chicago and Santa Fe require hands-free devices while behind the wheel. And although studies show that both hand-held and hands-free cell phones increase the risk of collision, we can all agree traffic wouldn't be nearly as fun without talking to your sweetie.

So maybe Colorado should join the ranks of Florida, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Nevada, New York, Oklahoma and Oregon, who have all passed legislation to bar governments from restricting their new favorite driving, multi-tasking pastime. Sure, there'll be a few more accidents, but I guess those are the brakes—err, breaks. But remember, just because you're on the phone doesn't mean you're carpooling.

George Bush can flaunt his time in the Texas Guard all he wants, but it doesn't make him a warrior. He can play dress-up on the flight deck of the U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln, but it doesn't make him a leader. He can say the United States doesn't torture prisoners, but it doesn't make it true.

What does make you a warrior is defending your country, like Sen. John McCain did in Vietnam, and enduring capture and five years of torture. What does make you a leader is standing up and saying torture is wrong—no matter how violent and depraved your enemy—and taking a stand against it and not backing down, like McCain did.

McCain the warrior spanked Bush the pansy over the torture ban last week, forcing the prez to change his tune on the issue and agree to the ban. Bush had repeatedly threatened to veto the bill but had to back down. It truly is a shame that Bush managed to defeat McCain in the 2000 GOP primary, because it robbed this country of the opportunity to vote for a real warrior and a real leader.

Still, it's nice to see the president finally wearing a pair of flip-flops. They look good on him.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com